Single Moms

Single Moms

Postby fireangel85 » Tue Aug 08, 2017 5:41 am

I've been a single mom since October 2013. Well really since my son was born my ex husband didn't help much in the year and 4 months after the baby was born. Anyways I don't really have a string support system with my family yes my parents help with taking care of my son like watching him so I can work but it's just hard. I have these crazy feelings. For one I never wanted kids not even after I found out I was pregnant. I only had my son because his father told me if I had an abortion that was the end of our relationship as well. I loved my ex husband and would have done anything for him. He has no contact with my son (his choice) however I still sometimes wish I hadn't had him. I know my feelings are horrible and I try very hard to not feel them but I can't help it. I've never told anyone any of this because we as women are "supposed" to want/love our children. I love my son of course I do! And I couldn't imagine my life without him now but I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm tired of being alone not having anyone to talk to and just being lonely in my day to day life. I don't date. Too many weirdos out there. I'm not open to having a relationship with another man and not because I still love my ex but because I don't want my son to get hurt. I don't want him to get attached to someone only to have them leave it's not fair to him. I guess I was just wondering if there are any other single moms out there in similar situations or that have been here and could help. Thanks for reading and have a wonderful day
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Joined: Thu Jun 22, 2017 6:05 pm

Re: Single Moms

Postby Moosey » Tue Aug 08, 2017 10:22 am

I'm not a single mom - but I am a mom. It is really hard- harder than you can imagine. Sounds like you have some depression. 4months right? Do you have some post pardum depression? I think you should explore this. Also- it sounds like you are isolated a bit. Running around like a crazy person- to and from work- rush home take care of baby- probably falling asleep early. Then up in middle of night. I think you should push yourself out- go to some mother groups- like at the library- they have free story time. When my child was a baby- once a week- I would force myself out of house to a gym class for mommy and kids. I would also go to a swim class with her. It's very hard to work and raise a child. Plus- you are grieving for the loss of your ex. You don't need to date to get out there and make connections- go make connections with other moms. You may be surprised that there are other women just like you. But seriously- go to your doctor- sounds like you need help with some depression girl.
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Re: Single Moms

Postby pdmathews » Wed Oct 18, 2017 6:16 pm

I am a single mom, have been for 13 years! My son's father has never been around so I can honestly say I wouldn't have made it this far without my family to help me. Like you I have never really dated because I didn't want to bring guys around for him to get attached to just to leave. It can been awful lonely when you live like we have chosen to live. If you need someone to talk to I am here!!!
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Joined: Wed Oct 18, 2017 6:05 pm

Re: Single Moms

Postby Pheephee » Sat Oct 28, 2017 12:28 am

I wish I had something really helpful to say. I’m 42 and had my first and only child at 37. Her father ran off to Denmark to be with another woman just out the blue. We have been abandoned almost from the outset. She is four now and has no relationship with him really. He pops up now and then then disappears again. He provides no financial nor emotional support. We live alone. Both my parents are dead and my three sisters live in another town. I have zero support. No grandparents for her, no one at home to relieve some of the pressure. So I know what you’re going through. I have been there, angry, suicidal, regretful, you name it. She is my world but this was never the plan for my life to be a single mom struggling. I do have days when I wish I was “free”. But I love her to death.

Work keeps me sane and on the outside I seem to have it all together, but it’s a daily struggle.

What I can say is...Be grateful that you have your parents. Many days I wish my mother was around. Things would be easier. All I can say is, they grow up fast and I expect that when they are older it gets easier — physically.

Email me if you want to communicate privately: ******

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