Second pregnancy but first baby!

Second pregnancy but first baby!

Postby Sianxxx » Fri May 19, 2017 1:12 pm

So I got pregnant a while back with someone who owned their own house, we both was in stable work and both very ready. Due to emotional pressure and bullying I got rid of the baby, worst day of my life I cried a lot and still hold grudges on the family who pushed me to it. It was because of my age I was 17 at the time but earning a lot more than most adults and so was he! Long story short, I got drunk and now I'm pregnant again. But babies dad said for me to f*ck off. Yay. I'm way to scared to tell the people who didn't agree before, but I can't go through that again, in fact my abortion actually failed and went wrong and I ended up in my bath tub contracting and having huge blood clots and was in and out of hospital and now have a smalerl chance of getting pregnant or the pregnancy getting far. So I'm thrilled to be pregnant! Should I just move out away from my family and then tell them so I'm safe from them constantly coming in my room and telling me all the bad stuff like before? Or hide it as long as possible? Or just bite the bullet and put my foot down? IDEAS AND ADVICE PLEASE :( -also don't judge if possible, if you got bad comments to say, get of the post-
Sianxxx
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Fri May 19, 2017 12:57 pm

Re: Second pregnancy but first baby!

Postby flopsy » Sat May 20, 2017 1:34 am

Hmm. I honestly don't know. You have several options as you mentioned. On one hand you could say nothing. If you don't get morning sickness this will be easier to hide for the first trimester.
On the other you could move out if you are old enough to. Get a place of your own and not mention anything about pregnancy. Or do so but they might come visit or call/text all the time.
Or be quiet until they notice something and ask. Then put your foot down.
Maybe someone else has some advice.
My mother in law worked with a girl once and one day the girl didn't show up for work. Found out she had a newborn baby. No one knew she had been pregnant. The girl kept it hidden from all, even her parents. I think you should weigh the pros and cons and decide.
flopsy
 
Posts: 3414
Joined: Thu Aug 06, 2015 1:20 am
Location: BC, Canada

Re: Second pregnancy but first baby!

Postby Krimzin » Sat May 20, 2017 6:57 am

Well your first stop is to get insurance if you don't have it. If you're on your parents you'll need to get off. If you can get on govt assistance do it. That will help with food, insurance and possibly even housing. WIC is also a good resource for pregnant women and after birth as well. Start saving now to move out, save as much as you can if working since you'll need a place to live.

This guy who got you pregnant has a responsibility whether he likes it or not. Give him a little bit of time to adjust to the new development and then let him know he can either be apart of this child's life and pay for expenses. Or he can be ordered to help by the court. This child is your life now, she or he will have needs that will need to be met and the guys isn't necessary for that.

As for your family I would tell them when you feel the time is right. If it's the day after you move out then so be it. You need to focus on making sure your future is on track and if that means avoiding the constant harassment of your family, then don't tell them right away. Sooner or later they will find out but you need to keep your stress level down and just keep your head up. When you do tell them make sure your firm with them, tell them you are an adult and want this child so they can either be happy for you or stay out of the way. You will not be bullied in to giving up another child just for them.

If you are interested in other options with the pregnancy there is always adoption, but that's totally up to you. Just letting you know all the options out there. 🙄
Krimzin
 
Posts: 275
Joined: Thu Aug 06, 2015 5:56 am

Re: Second pregnancy but first baby!

Postby Sianxxx » Sat May 20, 2017 8:07 am

Thank you guys. This morning morning sickness struck and mum had suspicions but I played it of as bad chicken last night. Saving for a deposit on a place now just agency fees are so so expensive. So trying to find a nice place through private sellers is a longer route but it saves money. There is a thing called pregnancy matters who I talk to often who offer accommodation but I have a pet rabbit and they are trying to see if they can work the way around her as often they don't allow pets but she's reaching age so I can't put her for adoption no one will want her and I'll be heart broken loosing her. But my friends are more than happy to help out where's needy. But out of my friends, I'm the only one who works full time and drives so they are there morally :) thank god! But thank you ladies I'll definitely take your advice!
Sianxxx
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Fri May 19, 2017 12:57 pm


Return to Young Moms

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests